Building the Confidence Needed for Good Success | EP #32

Confidence is not arrogance. It is the belief that you are capable of growing, learning, and succeeding despite fear, setbacks, and challenges. 

In Episode 32 of The Designers of Change Podcast, we explore how to build the confidence needed for good success and why confidence is essential for leadership, purpose, growth, and personal development. 

Many people remain stuck not because they lack talent, but because they lack confidence in their ability to move forward. 

In this episode we discuss 

• What true confidence really means
 • Why confidence is necessary for success and leadership
 • How fear and self doubt limit potential
 • The connection between mindset and achievement
 • Building confidence through preparation and discipline
 • Why growth requires stepping outside your comfort zone
 • Learning from failure instead of being defined by it
 • Developing a healthy self image and belief system
 • The importance of consistency and self awareness
 • Surrounding yourself with people who strengthen your growth 

Confidence is built through action, growth, resilience, and experience. 

If you have ever doubted yourself, questioned your ability, or struggled to take the next step, this episode will encourage you to believe again and move forward with purpose. 

Watch now and start building the confidence needed for good success. 

Like, subscribe, and share with someone who needs this encouragement. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Coming up on this episode of the Designers of Change podcast, your feet will never take you where your mind has never been.

SPEAKER_02 0:08

Your outer life is a reflection of your inner life. As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he be transformed by the renewing of your mind. And so when you remove the shackles from your mind, you can live a better life.

SPEAKER_00 0:31

Thank you for tuning into the Designers of Change podcast. We are at episode 32. And on this special episode, we want to talk about how do you build self-confidence that's needed for good success. And I think in a world like today, a lot of people think self-confidence is actually something else. So we want to break that down really nicely for you. As usual, my co-host, Mr. Wright, CEO of Mind Food International, is here to help us with that discussion. What is self-confidence anyway?

SPEAKER_02 1:09

I mean, before we even go into what is self-confidence, I want to give a quote by our national hero, Marcus Garvey for those who don't know. If you are not a Jamaican, Marcus Garvey is one of our national heroes. And he said something powerful. He said, EU lacks self-confidence is twice defeated in the race of life. Let me say that. He said, EU lacks self-confidence is twice defeated in the race of life. That's powerful. And so when we have self-confidence, when we have self-confidence, is it is a belief that you have in your own self and knowing your own worth in layman's terms. So self-confidence is believing yourself, knowing your own worth, having the right identity about you. Now, without self-confidence, we can't achieve very much. Because you need that a level of belief in self to know that I am good enough. I'm worthy enough. I can get this thing done. So we need we need self-confidence. We need self-confidence if we are going to be successful. We need to know who we are. You know, before there's a word that we normally joke, it's bigly B-I-G-L-Y. Before Donald Trump, that was a grammatically inconstruct. In construct. And guess what? Because Donald Trump is confident in who he is, he spoke that word so much that bigly B-I-G-L-Y is now a word, it's now an adjective in the dictionary. And so when you are when you are confident in who you are, it makes you believable. And so if you lack confidence, even what you are pursuing, even what you are saying, we are not going to believe you. And so when you have a level of self-confidence, you know who you are. Then whatever, even if you are saying something that is not even truthful, if it's saying something that is not is is even foolish, if it's coming from a place of confidence, it makes you believable. And one of the first things about building self-confidence is knowing who you are and know your value. And here's the thing about knowing who you are and knowing your value. The first thing is to know your identity. Yes. Who am I? Because you can't know your worth. You can't know your value unless you have a solid self-image or identity of who you are. And guess what? You can't get those self-identity from things that will move, like your car, your shoes, your job, your house, where you live. You can't get those things because those things are always moving. And if you place your value, they can change. If you place your value and your worth and those things that are constantly moving, it simply means that your self-value and your worth will move. Because guess what? If I place my value and how much money I have in the bank, if I place my value and my title, then what if I place my value and say I'm a lawyer? What if I was debarred from being a lawyer and I get all of my worth and from that? Confidence from that. So if I'm debarred, you're going to be lost.

SPEAKER_00 4:24

It's gonna be crazy.

SPEAKER_02 4:26

And so to know yourself, you have to find who you are.

SPEAKER_00 4:29

So identity is the first thing. I mean, if if you root your confidence in who you know, you know, in the in your source, in God, then you're you're doing the right thing, you're at the right place. But if it's coming from something external, if it's coming from something that can be changed, can be taken away, you're in you're in serious problems. Because really and truly, and that's what we see today in society, you know, you look online, you see people, they root their confidence in what they drive, where they live, yeah, their friends, their social status, and those things are so fickle. What about self-talk? What does that have to do with confidence?

SPEAKER_02 5:15

Yes, all right. If sometimes if there are some of us we we speak to ourselves in some we speak to ourselves in such manner that if people could hear ourselves talk, if we speak to others the way we speak to ourselves, it was it would be deemed verbally verbal abuse. Yes. Because some of us we speak to our own self, we put down in that manner, we put down our own self, we put down our own self, we don't see any worth in our own self. So self-talk, self-talk is very important. What am I saying to myself? Because guess what? The only person you cannot get away from is you is you and if your internal dialect is is is miscued from the truth of who you are, if it is negative, if your self-taught is abusive, then guess what? You are going to lack confidence in yourself, you are going to be an agnostic to your own self.

SPEAKER_00 6:22

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 6:22

And so you need to to guard your yeah, the voice that is in your head. Probably need to change it. You know, there's a song that talks about the voice in my head, but you got to speak to it. What is it that the voice that is in your head saying, is it the voice that in your head is diminishing you as a person? Because if that's so, that is not who God created. You know, Paul said, I can do, I can do, I can do all things through Christ who strengthened me. So the first part I can do, it's it's a part of being self-belief because you cannot do anything that God called you to do be until you believe in yourself. So he said, he said, I can do all things. And then he says, through Christ who strengthened me. So the first part of it, I can do all things. I know I can do it. I know I can. That means you believe in yourself, you have confidence in yourself, and so that is the thing that you need to replace. He said, Think and beast things, whatever is true, whatever is noteworthy.

SPEAKER_00 7:26

You know, as I started my um journey into um self-discovery and just you know, knowing who I am, um, of course, self-help books helped. Um, and but we know the Bible, the word of God is powerful more than anything else. But in those same self-help books is the word of God, that's what they use in us. And I remember at a particular point in my life, I did uh a YouTube video with some affirmations, and somebody was pretty much saw the video and posted and saying, Oh, these people they're teaching self-help stuff which are included in the Bible. And I was so I was so annoyed because I was like, all of those affirmations are coming from the Bible. What are they talking about? Do they understand how powerful self-talk is? Yeah, you know, referring to what you want and where you want to go by saying, I am already there. Do they understand that God Himself said I am? Yeah, that I am, you know, so these things are so important, and then you know, if you want to build self-confidence, just before we go on the break, really quickly, if you want to build self-confidence, you are going to have to find a way to stop comparing yourself to others.

SPEAKER_02 8:40

Yeah. Do you know there is a research it shows that the number one feeling or the number one emotion that a person opens um that a person feels, the number one emotion or the number one feelings that a person feels when he opens any social media app is jealousy. Is jealousy why? Because we are always comparing ourselves before we we are now comparing ourselves with the social media Joneses. So so is not no is no longer next door. So we are no longer comparing ourselves with the Joneses next door, but no, we are keeping up with the social media Kardashians.

SPEAKER_00 9:21

Oh Lord.

SPEAKER_02 9:22

So so we are now in an era that is built on AI, that is built on filter that we can edit and doctor.

SPEAKER_00 9:29

People do that things, right?

SPEAKER_02 9:32

So so if you are going to compare yourself with other people, it is one of this most slippery slope into discontentment, into lacking self-confidence. And so that is why when an ass is running, those big nice tower bread is running, they put on blinders because you don't want to get caught up in anybody's rink of people. You have to be focused on my dreams and my vision. You can't be over here looking at somebody else's doctored life because uh we have said it this we have said it before in many podcasts that what you what most of what we see with our own eyes, we are easily deceived by our own eyes. And so what we see with our own eyes does not tell the entire story. So stop comparing yourself with people that you have no idea to. Don't compare yourself to your neighbor, trust your own um process, run your own race because the moment you look to your right, to your left, comparing yourself with others, you tend to become something you're gonna be distracted. You're going to be distracted. Sometimes people become jealous, sometimes you compare yourself and say, Oh my god, I'm doing something like that person. I'm not good at I'm not good like that person. Nobody will want my product, nobody will want my song, nobody will want my book because I'm not good as like that person. I can't write like that person. And guess what? The moment you are doing that is the moment you are lower, lowering yourself, is the moment you have you are slipping to discontentment, the moment you're confident, erode. And sometimes it can even work the opposite, where we become arrogant because we are comparing ourselves with others and say, you know what, I'm better than this person. So the comparison trap is a dangerous one.

SPEAKER_00 11:22

And again, the same jealousy you feel when you open the app will cause you to treat people different. Yeah. You know, because when you're seeing good things happening to people, you may be jealous and you start treating them poorly because you feel as though that should be you. Um, you know, it's just such it's as he said, it's a slippery slope. You don't want to go down there. Um, we wanna just take a break when we get back. We are going to wrap this up really nicely for you, just to give you some steps as to how you can build your self-confidence for good success. Stick and stay. Welcome back to the Designers of Change podcast. We're talking about good success, building self-confidence for the good success, because you cannot, you're as Marcus Garvey said, you're twice defeated if you lack self-confidence. We want to say a huge thank you to our sponsors, major sponsors, Jas Myra Media, Mind Food International, Super Lative Auto, uh Proactive Lifestyle Limited, and we have some more. You wanna stick and stay, listen? We'll advertise everybody at the end. Right now we're we're strapped for time. Uh, but um, you know, you mentioned a number of things that cause people to be um lacking in self-esteem, in self-confidence. Now we wanna talk about how do you build that self-confidence? What do you do? How do you do it?

SPEAKER_02 13:02

The first one is we have to you have to move beyond your limited um mindset. And how do we do that? We need to build a reservoir for our own mind or our stream of information, knowledge to our own mind. Read good books, get mentorship, listen podcasts like these, and so that you can build your mind because your feet will never take you where your mind has never been. We say that so many times, and it is true. Your feet will never take you where your mind has never been. Your outer life is a reflection of your inner life, as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he be transformed by the renewing of your mind. And so when you remove the shackles from your mind, you can you can live a better life, you can you can move in the direction of your dream. You know, back in slavery when the the slave master didn't want the the slave to progress in life, all they had to do was prevent the slave from reading. But the moment a slave becomes educated, the moment a slave reads and expands his mind, then that select that slave throw the shackles off their mind because they know freedom for an individual is always in your mind because if you know the truth, it shall set you free. And so you need to move beyond the limited belief of your own thinking, remove the barrier, remove your own self-imposed limitation, and that is one of the ways, surest way to build confidence.

SPEAKER_00 14:39

Absolutely, and what about just uh securing small wins? Yeah, like you know, a lot of people say, Oh, I don't have the confidence to do that. You have some things that you have under your belt that's you know you can look at and say, Man, I've done these things, so that means that I am credible, right? You have to remember those wins.

SPEAKER_02 15:00

Yeah, all of us have wins. The balance sheets of life, we have losses and we have wins. So the very thing that you are you you set out to do in life, you have wins in there. Even if you're not winning as yet, look in your life, do an audit of your life, become an accountant, become an accountant of your own life or an auditor of your own life. You're going to come through your life and find out where are those small wins. Right. And you're going to think about those small wins. Build on those small wins. You know, before David takes on Goliath, David recalled the victory that he had against the bear and the lion, and that was enough to boost his confidence. So think about those small wins, those amateur wins. Probably you are a good chef, probably have cooked at a few small events before. Whatever it is, use those small wins to build your confidence. Build on those small confidence wins.

SPEAKER_00 16:05

Absolutely. And then you want to also add value to others. So while you're building your small wins, also volunteer. That's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_01 16:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 16:13

Service to many leads to greatness. Sometimes you may not be in demand yet, but if you make yourself useful, right? Offer your services, do some freebies, some pro bono. You'll have more to show for what you can produce.

SPEAKER_02 16:31

And and here's another one you develop confidence by taking action. Yeah. Let's say you want to be a public speaker. You're not going to be a public speaker by just reading books. You know, the other day, a young, a gentleman, he calls me is a young man just like myself. He wants to become a public speaker. And I told him, apart from reading books, listening to audio tapes, um learning about the era that you want to become a good speaker. And I told that young man, you can start by speaking at school. Because if you speak at school, speaking is like driving. The more you drive, the better you become at it. But you're not going to sit down the entire day replaying your conversation or replaying a speech in your head. Many times we know the speech. Many times we know that as a speaker, your speech sounds better in your head.

SPEAKER_00 17:29

Than when you actually do it. Than when you actually do it.

SPEAKER_02 17:32

And I told him the only way you're going to build confidence as a speaker is to get in front of those small events, get in front of those kids, and you practice on them. Practice, practice, practice. And then, like a driver, the more you drive, the better you become. And so through doing learning and failure, learning from your failure, you are building confidence. And again, you are building small wins. And again, you are building momentum. So all of that, it starts to add to your balance sheet. You have more assets than you have liability. You have more wins now. And so your confidence is growing little by little. But if you sit down there, boy. If you sit down there, you're not going to become confident. So guess what? Do the small things excellent. Repeatedly. Repeat it and it will compound.

SPEAKER_00 18:24

Absolutely. Now you also have to renew your confidence after setbacks and failure. Failure is one sure way to knock you down.

SPEAKER_01 18:33

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 18:34

You will lose confidence when you have failed. You've experienced obstacles. But guess what? Remember, we always talk about this on the podcast. That very same thing that has caused disruption is the very same thing that's going to sharpen you as a professional, as an individual. And listen, you see, after the failure, you see, after the setback, that is when you become confident because you know that that storm did not take you out. Instead, you have become a more advanced, adaptive, a more agile professional. And that's what you need. You need some failures under your belt as well. And the bounce back is usually better than who you were before. And the last point renew your confidence with God. Yeah. With God, man, that's when you are truly, truly.

SPEAKER_02 19:29

Yeah, I want you to wash your mind. Believing in yourself. Wash your mind with the word of God. You know, Paul said, be transformed by the renewing of your mind. The first part we talk about, to have true confidence, you must have your true identity and it must be rooted in God. Because when they are building a skyscraper, a skyscraper is built on bedrock. Bedrock is a part of the earth that will never move. So they anchor the foundation and bedrock. So that when the the winds of life come, earthquake, the building sway. But it always comes up right because it anchored to something that will not move. You are going to have setback in life. But when you anchor on the rock of all age, when your identity is built on God, something, someone who never changes because he's a rock of all age. Guess what? The more things change, the more you rely upon those things that does not change. And some of you, my friend, will have true identity. You'll have true confidence. And you will go for it. Because you can't become successful in life if you are not confident. As our national hero Marcus Maziah Gavi said, if you lack self-confidence, you are twice defeated in the race of life. And as Apostle Paul says, I can do what he said, he said, I can do all things. I can do all things through Christ who strengthened me. That means the first part, I can do all things, meaning that I am confident within myself. Because you I don't want you to be an agnostic for your own self. And the last thing, speak kindly to yourself, love on yourself. And I'm not telling you to become a narcissist. But think on the thoughts that God wants you to have about yourself. And if you like this video, if you love this video, if you want us to help us to pay Jace is right here laughing, then do do us the right thing. Do something that put a smile on our face. Hit that subscription button for us and subscribe and tell someone else that the design of that change is a very good podcast. Yes, please tell another friend.

SPEAKER_00 21:48

We appreciate you. And I really enjoyed this topic about self confidence. Many of us lack it, many of us will work on it. But so grateful for the gems you've shared. So grateful. For our sponsors as well, James Mary Media, Mindfood International. Of course, if you need training, staff development, reach out to us. We will make that happen for you. Also, to Caribbean Gospel TV, Super Lative Auto, Grace Creates, Amanda's Kitchen, Jesse's Home Decor, The Self Care Bar, Mag 247 Wrecking Services. Also to SK Catering and Proactive Lifestyle. Limited regional consultative services. And listen, so many more companies will be joining us. I know because we need help on this mission. But we're so grateful to be able to sit and chat with you, stick and stay for more episodes on the designers of change.